Friday, 31 July 2026

Top roles of Ewa Smolińska

The name of Ewa Smolińska is not known in the mainstream, and she's primarily a television and stage actress. Her dubbing credits are few. Even when she gets major roles, there are times when she's not the best directed. But when she's good, she's really good.

3. Old Woman (Shrek)

Smolińska has wonderful comic timing in her final role before her brief retirement. Her role is basically a comic character, even though she was the donkey's abuser, but her distinctive voice makes her stand out a great deal.




2. Olczakowa (M jak Miłosc)

Smolińska brings a vivacity to Olczakowa, Barbara's chatty neighbor. Even in a minor role, she plays a character you like and care about.




1. Lampy (The Brave Little Toaster)

To get it out of the way, yes, he was a guy, and his gender was changed to female for language difference reasons.

Smolińska, bringing her strong, melodic voice to Lampy, is completely in her element, giving a performance that's refined but also very relaxed and casual. Her Lampy has an elegant, ladylike voice, but has a defiant streak as well, and can be blunt and confrontational. She's very personable in the role and gives her a surprising amount of depth. She's funny as well, and her line delivery is very unique and memorable.



Sunday, 28 June 2026

How The West Was Won is another cinematic guilty pleasure

 This 1962 epic is tub-thumping, jingoistic Manifest Destiny propaganda but I like it.

The film as it's screened today looks like you're watching it through a fish-eye lens, but compared to movies made today, I love how it takes advantage of its vast aspect ratio and immerses you in the scene. You have characters standing apart from each other or at different distances. Sometimes you have one character standing in the center but it's made to add to the immersion.

It looks like a silly museum piece but there's a charm about that aesthetic. It's also why I like Si Versailles m'Ètait Conté, although that one is a comedy and doesn't take itself too seriously.

I generally love Westerns because there's an earthiness about them. Having them shot in high-quality Technicolor always helps.

As a fan of Eli Wallach, I got it because it was one of his seven Western movies, though he only appeared in the last half hour. I think he was one of the best actors in the film. I've also realized that his Charlie Gant and Henry Fonda's Jethro Stuart are two sides of the same coin: both are characters fighting a changing world and fighting to preserve their ways of life, though while Charlie is a psychotic outlaw whose reasoning, while understandable, is incredibly entitled, Jethro is a peace-loving mountain man who co-exists with the people incrementally being forced out.

Eli Wallach as Charlie Gant

Henry Fonda as Jethro Stuart


As a film that was made for roadshow screenings, it had a very grand, theatrical prologue and intermission, illustrated with a painting you'd probably find in a Midwestern library or steakhouse. At the intermission the image is accompanied by a medley, arranged by Alfred Newman, of traditional American songs, along with something written to the tune of 'Greensleeves'. The whole thing is very kitschy and it's one of my favorite parts of the movie.


The film indulges in buzzwords like "progress", conveniently glossing over the fact that the West was more stolen than won, and at the end crows about "legends of courage and pride" and brags about how cities were built "to rank among the great ones of the world". 

The ending song, playing over a prototype of Soarin' Over California, also utilizes lyrics like "Here came dreamers with Bible, fist and gun" and "They tamed the savage prairie land" to justify the violence of the white invaders (who displaced Spanish Californians and Mexican Americans as well as countless Indigenous tribes) to morally set them apart from the alleged "savages". 

All this is why 'How The West was Won' is one of my top guilty pleasure films. It's up its own backside, it embodies the worst aspects of mid- 20th Century Westerns but I enjoy it a lot.



Sunday, 31 May 2026

Being a Lupin III fangirl for five years

 Five years ago I became a proper Lupin III fangirl and it has inspired me in so many ways. I have traveled, examined artefacts at museums and read old books and manuscripts. I've been motivated to learn in a way I haven't been before. I've been a tourist in my own city and discovered hidden corners. I've even found the grave marker of one of the original Arsène Lupin's actors, Gerald du Maurier.

Not to mention the ways I've been inspired in my art. My film 'I Boarded The Wrong Plane' uses heavy color inspiration from Part 2.






Even this closeup from 'Sweet Nothings' was inspired by 'The Mystery of Mamo'.



Thursday, 26 February 2026

A statement about Aliya Rahman

 In April 2018, the day after my 25th birthday, I was forcibly removed from the BFI screening of 'The Good, the Bad and the Ugly'. It was traumatizing for me, being punished while enjoying my favorite film.

However, the unfair treatment of me came from a place of misunderstanding. It is nothing compared to Aliya Rahman, an autistic woman like myself, being deliberately and cruelly manhandled by Republicans and their enforcers twice in a short space of time, first when she was dragged from her car, and then when she was forcibly escorted from an exclusive political event that Representative Omar invited her to. I am not expressing outrage, because cruelty from the Republicans is of no surprise to me. But I would like Ms. Rahman to know that she is not alone.

Wednesday, 10 December 2025

Let's Kaitou! at 15

 Happy anniversary to this strange, horrifying, offensive gift that keeps on giving.

The game's idea revolves around teenage female versions of Lupin III and his gang going to a "phantom thief school" and of course all "doing it" with the player character.

Why would they need to be at a thief school? As Lupin III said in a chapter, "A thief makes his own rules." I guess the scenario is an excuse for more sick underage fantasies.

It's part of this "jotaika" thing I discussed in my first Substack article.

Why the shorty shorts? Why? Oh, well, at least you finally believe me about Ai Rohan.

She's gone for that Haruhi band there.


Yes, the Lupin III counterpart is named Ai Rohan, which, as I have said before, I think is either very lucky or very clever, given that Henriette D'Andresy's distant cousin is the Count of Dreux-Soubise... There is even a Rohan Center at the Louvre.

This game has inspired lots of art from me, including a short animation that was shown at the Dorking Film Festival in 2024, and a comic idea.

I have also done art of Rohan inspired by Lupin III commercials, a kabuki play and a series idea that never got greenlit. Why? The reasons are complicated. 

I have also done art of Ooka Tsugimoto, and Otome Zenigata, and of Koyomi Ishikawa to a lesser extent (Goemon was never my favorite). 

The website is full of Easter eggs and mysterious writing that I'm not paying money for the game to understand. 

Or just corny jokes like the one on the bottom.


And some things in the game itself are just illegible. Probably has something to do with sexual harrasment or jewels.



Friday, 5 December 2025

Joe Walsh is pretending to be against Donald Trump

 I wonder what Senator Joe Walsh's end game is? Usurption of the Republican party?

The Illinois politician is now creating manufactured drama, along with Donald Trump's other supporters, and pretending to be a repentant sinner. In truth, Walsh knew Donald Trump's true nature when he supported him in 2016. He stands by this comment:

 "This is now war. Watch out Obama. Watch out black lives matter punks. Real America is coming after you"

He still hasn't explained what he means by "Real America".

He's pretending to regret supporting Donald Trump but we know that regret in politics doesn't exist.

Thursday, 4 December 2025

Keep moving forward!

This is an animatic I did of characters I created between 2008 and 2010.

Hopefully this will teach younger genrations that the 2000s were, to paraphrase the famous like from A Tale of Two Cities, the best of times and the worst of times.

https://vimeo.com/1075232619/